Baseball!

Lets go dodgers! Opening day. The pre-game show the fireworks the music the fans all in gear. The smell of fresh cut grass. The stadium Parking and peanuts. Beer and hot dogs. That's what the baseball is about. At least to me the crowd singing take me out to the ball game. The seventh inning stretch. Fact that you know that even if you make less money. Are from a different country or speak more than one language that you have baseball to keep you together. That's what life is about. Delilah. Was exactly 1 month old the first time I took her to a game. She was a trooper. Didn't cry when I screamed and whooped for my boys in blue. She just looked all around and yawn and slept and ate like a good girl that she is. i think the hardest thing about opening day is that i am not there to cheer on the boys in blue. and that my sister is there without me.  My favorite Team. I had my dodger gear on today even though i work in a setting where i prove nursing care my dress code requires me to be dressed as business casual. i had my dodger watch and bracelet and lanyard. needless to say the locals mostly texas ranger fans where seething with anger. i liked no matter what we were all happy that wether i was cheering for the home team or the local team we were all happy that baseball was  back!!!!! maybe this will help fill the void i feel inside.

Marriage

ok lets try this again. I have come almost full circle since arriving to this place. i have found that my marriage is so much stronger and committed nothing like having no one here to count on to make you really want to be with your spouse..

We are very very very far from perfect and we bicker often the truth is that i have a hard time being next to him and then i find it hard to be away from him. it like i cant breathe when he is around and i can't breath without him. and all i ever worry about is that he does not feel the same way. It's a lot like those horrible chick flicks. I guess the hardest thing is that i am not sure of what is to come i have made many many mistakes and the fear is a rational from my childhood i do not want to be the same woman i do not want to go thru the same things that my parent went thru where my mother, loved my father and my father took her and her love and the hard work she put into the relationship for granted. i have not always felt this way there was a time when i truly contemplated a divorce and the truth is that if it wasn't for the efforts that my husband put in when i had given up. we would not be together but we are together because of him.